Assalam 3alaykum wa rahmatullah wa barakatuhu,
Hello, iam a 39 year old german , single mother of two beautiful kids in the age 6 and 14.
My way to Islam started last year January. My husband has left me and our Kids, to finallly be with his girlfriend, almost 2 years ago. So in this days of january 2001, i had my first contact to arab people through chat. I have met some friends, who are living in marocco. They have invited me to visit them, wich i did in march 2001. It was my first arab country to visit and i really enjoyed my time living with an arab family. It was also the first time, to see a mosque, to hear the call for prayer, to hear the reciting of the Holy Quraan , to see moslem people take there prayer ( the women of my friends family). To see and hear all of this, has finally brought me and my heart some peace. For the first time in my life i was really happy, and i had found peace. ALHAMDULILLAH. It was my first step to Islam. After i returned back to germany, i started looking for Islamic sites in the Internet and i found many, wich i read with a lot of interesst, but my famous of all this sites is
http://www.reciter.org/, where i can listen to the reciting of the Holy Quraan. Wich i did and still do many times, because i feel so peaceful and relaxed only by listening to it. ALHAMDULILLAH
Well i must tell you, that my way to Islam is going hand in hand with my way to palestine. After my return from marocco back to germany, i excidently run into Yahoo arab chat and the first time in my life, i had contact to a palestinian, who started telling me about Palestine History. And also very interessted in the palestinian issue, i start seeing the truth on what is going on there. And i have learned alot, i have seen many Pictures from there, i have been talking to a lot of palestinians. Well to know all the sides on this Issue, i also started to read the Holy Quraan. So Sura 17 - Bani Isreal, was the first what i have read in it. Well today iam very well informed about the palestinian Issue, i do as much as possible here in Germany to help the palestinian people. INSHALLAH
So after my trip to marocco, i was also able to visit Dubai in june 2001, wich gave me the opportunity to see and learn more about Islam. We where living in a hotel next to a mosque, wich was very wonderful to me and i left there with the same feeling as i had left from marocco. ALHAMDULILLAH So from there on my interesst in Islam grow together with the palestine issue, and one day i promised my self, if i was ever able to visit the holy land, i will look into converting to islam. And now, ALHAMDULILLAH , i was allowed to meet the holy land. I have been to Palestine. I went to Gazastrip, with the Plan, to see Hospitals, women associations and other places, to see where i can help them from germany.INSHALLAH. I never had planed to see more then the Gazastrip, but the situation there turned into bad, and i had to leave from there for my own safty. But i could not change my ticket back to germany, all the flights where boked out. In i did not know where to go, until some palestinian friends, whom i knew only from chat, one here in germany and one in jerusalem, made it possible for me to visit Jerusalem. I spend 4 days in jerusalem, wich gave me time to visist also a hospital, where i was able to talk to 4 men, who where injured recently in the clashes in Jenin and Ramallah. But the rest of the time i spend in the old city of jerusalem. One night i sat with my friend, his wife and his daughter on the balcony of his house, wich is just about 200m away from Al aqsa. That was the time when i decided to become a muslimah. I was aloud to see the holy land, even more....... I was aloud to see the holy city "Al quds".ALHAMDULILLAH So i asked my friends to help me on this. So the daughter of my freind helped to learn the SHAHEEDA that night, my freind called the Mufti of al aqsa and made an appointment for me, for the next day, the wife of my friend gave me a nice hijab and helped me to get ready for my visit of Al aqsa.
So on the day of my appointment, the daughter of my friend, went with me to Al aqsa. Well, and i had to face my first stone in my way to Islam in form of a Isreali policeman. He did not allow me to enter Al aqsa. He has stoped me at the gate and asked my where i want to go, so the daughter of my friend explained to him, and he tooked my passport. Oh, you are a German??? he asked. Yes Iam, i repleid. So he started laughing at me, and asked me, how i read my Holy Quraan? I told him in german, of course. So they started laughing at me again. Suuuuurrrre !!! he said. Then he asked me to say the Shaheeda to him, wich i did, ALHAMDULILLAH. Imaginge, to an isreali policeman ,the shaheeda. So after that he asked me again: Who is the famouse Studend of the prophet Mohammed (pbuh), wich i could not answer, so i told him: Guess from today on it will be me and smiled at him. After that i was asked to leave and they did not allow me to enter Al aqsa. So we tried another gate, but not alloud to enter.
So my friend tooked me to court next day, and i said the SHAHEEDA in front of a judge and my friend.ALHAMDULILLAH, i became a Muslimah. Finally that day, the secretary of my friend, brought me to Al aqsa. Me and her, we where aloud to enter, after some small questions at the gate form a police officer again.
AL AQSA. I am inside. ALHAMDULILLAH. We slowly walked through the park towards the mosque. It is a peaceful place, u will forget everything around you. I was just looking around taking ,deep breaths and i kept saying ALHAMDULILLAH. The only word i knew in arabic. Well , she tooked me to the Dome of rock, where usually the women pray. I cant describe what i felt, when my feet touched the floor inside of it, when i saw the the women and kids, the wonderful inside of the cupple. I felt like iam dreaming. And then she let me see the the holy stone, and to touch it, i could not move, i could ot breath, for a short moment i felt like iam somewhere else. After that we sat with the other women on the floor, just quietly, and i remebered that one of my palestinian friends, who live outside of palestine, had ask me to kiss the ground of palestine for him when iam in palestine. So i did that, right then and right there, inside the Dome of Rock. I bent over and my lips touched the floor. My head was spinning, i was thinking of my family, my friends, all my palestinian friends who are outside of palestine, not alloud to see what i see, for the palestinian people in gaza, jenin, ramallah. For all the people in the world. I kissed the ground of the palestine, in The Dome of Rock. Then my friend and me walked to the mosque, but it was prayer time, and all the men came there, so we where only able to go and see the part under the mosque, the old part of the mosque. We sat there again on the floor and my friend, she wanted to pray there. So while she prayed, i was sitting next to her, and my head started spinning again and i couldnt think anything, only kept saying ALHAMDULILLAH, and then tears came, slowly runing down my face and then i felt peace inside of me and happyness. When we left that place, i felt free, i felt easy, i found what i was lookig for all my life.
I found God, i found Allah (stw), i found home. Yes i am at home. Finally i know where and to whom i belong to. ALHAMDULILLAH
Now, iam back home in germany. I found a mosque here, where iam taking my islam and arabic classes, i have met new friends. Iam a memeber of a group of german muslimahs. I started wearing a hijab, iam slowly helping my kids to Islam. Inshallah. I still have much to learn.
Now when i sit back and take a review on the last 2 years of my life. The husband, who left, my meeting of arabs and palestinians in chat, my visit to marocco and dubai, my way to palestine, my love for palestine, was a big part on my way to Islam. Yes, today i know, Allah, has planed all that for me, to find him, to find happieness, to find peace. ALHAMDULILLAH I found his love, the love of my kids, the love of my friends, the love of palestine and palestinian people and the love of ahmed, my future Husband,Inshallah.
Assalam 3alaykum wr wb
Your sister in Islam
Amal el Zahra ´a
I would like to thank all my friends, who walked and still walking this path of my life with me, to find Palestine and Islam. My speciall thanks goes to my friend and brother Sami. May Allah bless them all.